Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God (2005)

In 7 words or less: Here we go again....Oh dear

What's it all About? The bad dude from the first film (no not Jeremy Irons, we're talking about his right hand man whose name escapes me) is back in a quest to take over the land. Booorrring.

Our plucky band of adventurers

Best bits? None. The effects are even worse than the first instalment. In fact this resembles a no-budget straight to dvd hamfest. I actually quite like the poster though.

Did it make you think thoughts? See this link: Dungeons & Dragons (2000) 

'Can you believe they paid me for this? The fools, ha ha ha'

Would you watch it again? No

Rating (out of 100%): This scores a couple of points based on the fact it has some comedy value. 6%

Dungeons & Dragons (2000)

In 7 words or less: Awesome fantasy dragon tale........erm...no.

What's it all About? An evil, vengeful sorcerer wants some kind of power rod that will help him control dragons and thus rule the land (maniacal laugh) Only some annoying teenage vagabonds an elf and a dwarf can save the day. Lord of the Rings this ain't. 

Best Worst bits? All of it.

Shouldn't this guy be in the Crystal Maze?

Did it make you think thoughts? There's an important question that need to be answered here. What the hell were you thinking when you decided to watch this Chief? Hhmm good question Chief. Why thank you Chief. I was under the impression that even though this was widely regarded as absolutely terrible, I would find some joy in it's fantasy sword and sorcery element. Oh dear, how wrong I was. Nothing like the fabulous cartoon or the long standing role playing game the only purpose this film served was to waste 107 minutes of my life. Oh yeah, what the hell is Jeremy Irons doing in this?

What do you mean this isn't the Tolkien book adaption

Would you watch it again? Ha ha, good one. 

Rating (out of 100%): Terrible direction, script, acting, choreography, effects, plot, lighting, sound direction, screenplay, cinematography and costumes. Worst film ever? Maybe. I give Dungeons & Dragons a Christmas ho, ho, horrible 3%

Avoid any movie with this clown in