Slumpy - Right-On Film Reviews

Tuesday 12 August 2014

Need For Speed (2014)


Sum this mother up in 8 words or less: Computer game about nothing into film about nothing

Okay, lay it on me: Merlin's beard... preposterous nonsense lasting over 130 minutes!? I'm guessing this lot rushed Aaron Paul on his last day of shooting Breaking Bad and he panicked and said 'yes'. Bad call, Aaron, you could have done anything! Anything but this! In fairness, I think I enjoyed it more than those 'Tokyo Fast Drift i'm Furious' films. At least this was done in-camera and had some creative shots. It's starts of as an easy midweek watch but the gargantuan running time really starts to take it's toll after the 90 minute mark. These lads love their cars, so much revving! Also, why is Michael Keaton in this? He must be saving up for a new shed or something.
Clearly too short to see over that wheel

Would you watch it again? No. This is midweek madness and then best forgotten.

Rating (out of 100): There's some form of trying going on here but I can only muster a 51

Chef (2014)


Sum this mother up in 8 words or less: Jon Favreau cooks instead of making Iron Men

Okay, lay it on me: This little beauty completely took me by surprise. After biting the big one and getting critically smashed to pieces for 2011's horrific 'Cowboys & Aliens' big Jon decided to take it back to the streets and make Chef, a low budget flick directed and starring himself. Chef clearly mirrors Favreau's experiences as a director making large studio films but secretly wanting to flex his artistic side by making smaller, more personal projects.

I thoroughly enjoyed this movie. Loved the snappy dialogue, the interaction with Favreau's character and his son, all really funny stuff. Had absolutely no problem with all the Twitter stuff, the graphics that appear on the screen when people are tweeting work really well in my opinion. Also, apparently Twitter had zero part in getting this film made or financed, the directer is just a massive fan and it serves the story. There's Twitter in life baby! Cynics stay away. 
Big Favreau tweeting his face clean off

Would you watch it again? Yeah! So easy. Such an easy watch!

Rating (out of 100): Chef gets a delicious, slow cooked, briskety 81

Friday 8 August 2014

Thor: The Dark World (2013)


Sum this mother up in 8 words or less: It's Thor 2. He visits Greenwich.

Okay, lay it on me: Of all the phase 2 Marvel films this feels like the one they rushed to get released and cared least about. Doesn't really have much impact on the Marvel Cinematic Universe, doesn't move much along, certainly not compared to it's other phase 2 counterpart, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, which basically changes everything. Having said all that this film is still a mighty Nordic romp with great casting and a totally enjoyable fast paced, simple storyline. Given the subject matter it really is a miracle this film works. Best enjoyed on a Sunday evening with a nice glass of Fanta.
Thor in the UK. Just look at that big hammer

Would you watch it again? Oh, totally. Love the Marvel films. Thor me!

Rating (out of 100): I give this a "HAMMER!" 79


Friday 1 August 2014

Safety Not Guaranteed (2012)

Sum this mother up in 8 words or less: Magazine interns go investigate time travel personal ad.

Okay, lay it on me: A great sci-fi indie from the man who is now directing Jurassic World, (Colin Trevorrow). This totally took me by surprise, it's funny, sweet and is about possible time travel. What more could you want? Plus, it had a totally good ending which is rarer and rarer these days.

Would you watch it again? Yes indeed! 

Rating (out of 100%): I give it a GIANT £90 (90%) for having a big old heart and a nice pair of balls too.
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