A Night In The Woods (2012)

In 7 words or less: Three student film-makers search for Blair Witch.

Scared in a tent.

What's it all About? A young couple plan a nice camping trip to Dartmoor. He likes cameras. She doesn't. For some very odd reason, she invites her old flirtatious boyfriend along to play the third wheel. The three of them are having a mediocre time, at best, before nightfall brings something altogether more scary... I think.

Cow

Best bits? The Location! Wistman's Woods on Dartmoor is the location. It looks great. I was also partial to the pretty realistic pub scene at the beginning. Also, if it's jump-scares you're looking for. You'll not get a louder jump this year! Just check out the audio waveform for the last 20 minutes of the film. Those levels are peaking right out! LOUD.... quiet quiet LOUD! and so on.

Did it make you think thoughts? The tension of the weird sexually frustrated camping trip is the most frightening thing in this film. I have no idea why the film makers would have it descend into an exact, albeit uninteresting remake of the Blair Witch Project. They could have gone in so many directions from the setup. It wouldn't have taken 30 minutes to stitch together a costume for a ghoulie or a monster. But what we get instead is... nothing. Just a shakey camera in the dark. Running. Screaming. Nothing. Nothing. Although there are good jump scares, whilst you are staring in the pitch black hoping for something to be there. But the scares come from the audio track. There's nothing visually or psychologically frightening.

A man crouches.

Would you watch it again? No thanks. It's a waste of the rich folklore of Dartmoor.

Running away from nothing.

Rating (out of 100%): 41% Some good acting. And the crow made me jump. CAW!