In 7 words or less: Horny vamps make vamp baby
What's it all About? Bella and Edward marry in a scene of beautiful tranquility amongst the white blossom trees of the Cullen's pimping forest mansion. Ahhhhh. Emotional stuff. Get the tissues out, go a bit misty eyed, it really is very sweet and a beautiful way to celebrate their rocky road to understanding they are two true souls destined to be. Ahhhh.
Right, cut to their honeymoon where they romp their way through a jungle retreat, blasting a bed into smithereens through their horny vamp sex.
Bella gets a vamp baby growing in her tummy and the rest of the film is about lots of different vampires, werewolves and humans trying to protect and/or kill her.
Best bits? Lets face it, we're all in it for the hot vamp sex. It really is a fascinating watch! They are unbelievably perfectly cast for their roles in this whole saga. RPatz is so swooney and gentlemanly with a twist of danger and Kristen Stewart is so fumble-some and awkward but with a twist of nympho about her eyes.
Best bits? Lets face it, we're all in it for the hot vamp sex. It really is a fascinating watch! They are unbelievably perfectly cast for their roles in this whole saga. RPatz is so swooney and gentlemanly with a twist of danger and Kristen Stewart is so fumble-some and awkward but with a twist of nympho about her eyes.
The birth of said vamp baby is a tough old watch but undoubtedly pretty well shot I thought. You see a lot but what you imagine just tips it over the edge *shudders*.
The ending was awesome. Very horror film like, good pull into the next one.
Did it make you think thoughts? Is this really a 12a? Is there really an 11 year old and her mum sat the other side of my caramel nibbles? How on earth have they rated this at 12a?!
Did it make you think thoughts? Is this really a 12a? Is there really an 11 year old and her mum sat the other side of my caramel nibbles? How on earth have they rated this at 12a?!
Why is it when there's something like a CG animal in a film they just can't help themselves? They get carried away with the old knobs and buttons and spoil it so you just start thinking about how they did it, rather than that thing being in the story....For example there was really no need to show the wolves having what I would describe as 'an angry wolf chat spoken through robotic voice machines perforated with pig oinking'. No. Need. Just strip it back guys, we know the wolves are all grrrrr scary, no need to robotise them or try and make their faces look extra angry. Grrrr.
Would you watch it again? Yes I would. If I were teen I would be lapping up this up faster than a thirsty werewolf having some water after a really really big fight. And he's really thirsty....It has the romance, the pain of love, the suspense and discovery of exploring sexuality, the drama, the bonding, the friendship, the true love: it's a teen girl's d-ream. Oh and R-Patz with his top off. So on that note, yes I would watch it again, because really us girls never grow up (that's why we're so annoying).
Rating (out of 100%): The reviews out there have been overly harsh on this one. I'm giving it a blood sucking 70%. it's a weird book so it's a weird film, but it does a good job of telling the story and I didn't get bored once. Right, now who's going to change me into a vamp?
